Mendeleev

Mendeleev died from influenza in his early seventies, and not,
after all, from drinking "Tsar's vodka". That's a myth
Perpetuated by some chemistry student as an afterthought
To a wretched essay. A science student's no wordsmith.

Although, I admit, it's delightful to imagine Mendeleev
Walking the short walk to his lab and home again each day
Until the fateful, Kafkaesque swig of aqua regia truncated
his research - including the periodic table (still used today)

And that other vodka myth. Russian myths are fantastic
Because you have situations like this, where there's
The "other vodka myth", and one of the vodkas is hydrochloric
Acid (mixed with nitric acid). Not real vodka. That clears

That up. Now. Mendeleev never came up with the 40% standard
Vodka strength either, and wasn't ever told to formulate new
State standards for the production of vodka. Perpetuating this pandered
To his reputation as "Russia's greatest scientist", but misconstrues

Mendeleev's dissertation. That was about stronger alcohol
Concentrations over 70%. Jokes about Russian stereotypes aside
And to set the record straight, it was fuel. Ethanol.
And he never wrote a thing about vodka, state standard or otherwise.